Holding on & Letting Go
I was texting two friends today. One, who has a kid entering Kindergarten in a few days. Another, who is sending off her kid into his Senior year. These friends are facing completely different phases, yet I was hearing the same tone and tension from their mama hearts - the many emotions tied into letting go. There is a letter I tend to pull out and read to parents of all phases during big, transitional life moments. For me, this letter shoots an urgency to pause deep down in my soul. It reminds me to make the most of the current phase I’m in with my kids and the beautiful journey of holding on + letting go as a parent. Whether your baby is heading into Kindergarten, you have a 5th grader beginning the Middle School journey, or you are soaking in your kid’s last first day of school, I know you will love this letter by Reggie Joiner. I pray you are reminded that the same God who chose which stars were going to be in the Milky Way Galaxy chose YOU to be the parent of your kid. So, He will equip you with whatever you need as you navigate this new school year!
“Knowing when to hold on and when to let go is more complicated than we ever imagined it would be. That’s because your kids trick you at first. When they are toddlers, they hold on to you very tightly and make you believe they are never going to let go. So you do what a parent should do, you hold on too. They may wander off a few feet but they always come running back. Then when they become young children, they act like they believe everything you say. They want you to be there for them at their games and at their important moments. They even pretend they want your advice and act like they believe most of what you say. So you keep holding on so you can lead them and guard their hearts. Then somewhere around middle school, they start teasing you. They let go when you are not expecting it and they do it more often than you feel like they should. They even start behaving like they expect you to let go more but they never really tell you when you should let go and when you should hold on. You are just supposed to know somehow. It is really confusing. The complexity of decisions can put you in a daze as a parent. Then without warning, they become teenagers and start moving toward adulthood at warp speed. That’s when there is the temptation to panic. You don’t want them to see it but it feels like there is so much at stake and these years can fluster the best of moms and dads. Personally, for me I know there was a tendency to hold on too tightly when I should have let go and a tendency to let go too soon when I should have held on. The problem is there is no textbook or parenting seminar or 24 hour counselor to explain exactly when you are supposed to let go and exactly when you are supposed to hold on. So you do the only thing you know to do, you guess. You pray, you feel your way through every decision and sometimes you get it right and sometimes you get it wrong. But you never stop trying to figure it out because of one primary reason, he is your son. She is your daughter and you want her to know that you will never stop fighting for her future and for your relationship with her.” Reggie Joiner
